POETRY
I was lonely and tired
It was the death of my desire
You showed up and you told me
Can I ask you to show me?
I have showed you my heart, it was bleeding
You said I'm a vampire, please feed me
I said blood is expensive, it costs love and intention
You said I can pay you with love, but not with intention
Instead of intention I gave you attention
You drank all of my blood, it was vengeance
Next time I met you, it was in my dreams
It wasn't romantic though, I told you to go back to sleep
After the fire of the desire dissolved
We were just strangers, who once drank each others blood
Your love was contagious
It felt like roses and sharp razors
I got a flat tyre
And we both decided to retire
Was it the roses or razors
That gave me the flat tyre?
No, it was you, you little vampire
Instead of biting me, you bit into the tyre
When I asked you why?
You said: to kill your desire and to set your heart on fire
When I asked you how are we going to get home with the flat tyre?
You said: fuck it, I'm a vampire
Your love was contagious
It felt like roses and sharp razors
I was lonely and tired
It was the death of my desire
You bit into the tyre
And set my house on fire
When I asked you why?
You said I want to kill you, I'm a sadistic vampire
We were young and quite crazy
I heard in movies actors say I love you my baby
I try to remember your name you little vampire
But In the back of my head I can hear
The death of desire
After I met the vampire
We were telepathic
Talking through thoughts, enigmatic
Our love was explosive, I bought you dynamite
You said it's better than roses
When you went on a trip
You said baby don't trip
I'm away, but we connected
If you cheat, the explosion might be hectic
Then I realized that I should have bought roses
So I was calm, avoiding explosions
When you got back, you brought me a gift
It was cyanide and I thought it was sick
I said: I always admired your pyromaniac spirit
You said: please don't insult me, I'm a maniac not a killer
Next day I forgot that we were telepathic
Talking through thoughts, enigmatic
In my thoughts I admired your maniac spirit
But in my heart, I wanted to kill you
Because you loved me, you could hear what was going on in my heart
So before I gave you the cyanide
You have cut my throat and I died
You laughed and you thought you have won
But the dynamite exploded
And once again it was 1-1
After your body blew up into pieces
We were together again indulged into business
Business was always about who can love more
And your maniac spirit could have been only adored
Our Love was explosive
Like the dynamite and the red roses
Telepathy and our connection was unending
I would ask myself
Why was it so reality bending?
And it turns out that we were on drugs
It was sunshine and rainbows
Until we had to grow up
But the telepathy never ended
I'm still looking forward to dynamite and the real ending
But you still want my blood
And my heart is still bleeding
I can feed you again
If you promise, that you will need me
This time without war, without any explosives
But who am I kidding?
It was you! You pyromaniac spirit!
So we blew each other to pieces again
Then I realised that my desire could never end
Because we will blow each other to pieces again and again
POETRY
It was winter, it was cold, we were drinking
I said I missed you so much and asked you
Why can we only fully express ourselves when we drinking?
Your answer was: because we are sinking
The abyss does not mind our overthinking
The bottomless pit is eating us up
But without each other we would dissolve into dust
I held your hand while you were crying
You gave me a hug and said
Please touch my heart I want to get higher
I asked you: Do you like my true face?
You said: We are all faceless, only our creator has the true face
One of us said No!
Our creator and us are the one and the same
The faceless explosion that will dissolve into dust
Only our love can hold weight
Because it will never go bust
You were evil and I was from planet Nibiru
Our creator was One and the same
Our hearts never knew the true evil
POETRY
How much love is in there?
In where?
In the place that was not there
I know what you mean
But I'm lost in your need
In your need to be loved, covered and hugged
It's a beautiful thing, two people and things
What things?
The admirable things: Blades, razors, red roses and wings
We are always so close to the absolute emptiness
But we care for each other, even after the nothingness
We shoot each other dead
And then walk around
Like nothing was said
Who made us so close?
Our trauma or was it love, or not even close?
I was waiting for you
And you said: I never have left
I needed some time to keep my heart in check
The culmination of thoughts led us quite far
Now we are strangers
While in the back of your eyes, I can see, there's still rainbows
You remember the rainbows during the rain?
We laughed and said it was ours after the kisses were made
It was our prison
And we haven't left yet
But it's too late to notice now
Because those versions of us are long dead
The desired outcomes, the egos, the dread
Inducing that fire to boil it like led
All the nails were crushed into the coffin
Our egos are buried
After that, there was nothing
But as we do, after the nothingness comes
We grab the chains and wrap them around us
Boiling led is getting closer, It will be hot
But I forgot the cyanide, I can't make it stop
It will hurt for a while, until we lose touch with reality
In a sense I am glad, we can scream, it's insanity
Why the torture and why so much pain?
We were dreamers, I told you, we were insane
POETRY
Shackled by law, attached to the ground
We managed to fly anyway, above all that sound
The road wasn't easy
There were bumps, wounds and a couple of shots
Things don't come easy
Attached to the ground
We kept it quite strong
We were clueless of what was going on
Who was the second and who was the third?
One after another, until all things went wrong
It was the time for discovery and for making solutions
Inner plasticity and all kinds of illusions
We got lost my friend
And we don't know where to go
Psychiatric hospital or the side of the road?
The former would offer us food and tight clothing
Probably padded walls and definitely no roses
Antipsychotic solution without the blood and red roses?
Tight clothing sounds good
But our minds will get stolen
The fact of the matter was
That we have lost our minds in our childhood, without us knowing
Solution were simple
Prison or hospital
It won't be that simple
Hallucinations were horrible
We smacked our heads against the padded walls
We preached to each other
Solutions will come once we break through them walls
But those walls were only the creation of our own minds
There was no hospital and there was no one around
The side road was your lonely heart
And the hospital
It was all in my mind
Then I woke up and realized I was dreaming
Dealt with rejection
Pretending I don't feel it
Communication interrupted
Our feelings corrupted
Psychotic symptoms can not interrupt it
I was talking to myself and talking to you
But you were just my hallucination
But I will be honest, I still do miss you
If I could only release enough LSD into the water supply
We all could go crazy, we all could just fly
Then I could talk to you again and again
Tell you I miss you
And wake up from that horrible dream once again
POETRY
Stuck in between the two worlds
One of hunger and another much worse
No calculations no name
Just pain pain pain
Between the two worlds
There's few islands and a horse
On top of that horse, there's an ego and worse
Two identities like two nations
Darkness and light in the eternal gesticulations
Both trying to disentangle
But the entanglement is too strong, too many of them trying to hold on
One side is full of explosions and sounds of destruction
The other of prayers and blessings and no liposuction
The basis of darkness is based on rebellion
The basis of light is based on understanding resilience
The weapons of darkness are feeding on the fear of the light
The weapons of brightness is burning the night
His name was Invincible
He was the Captain of the Forces of Night
Her name name was Maya
She was the princess of Light
The Captain of darkness gathered the troops
He wanted to invade the Castle of light and destroy Mayas troops
Maya was smart, she was the Goddess and the creator of the fundamental illusion
She created this play and this whole illusion
Her main weapon was her contract with Brahma
She made a pact with him that she will create all this drama
The drama of separateness and the veil of illusion
It was her job, the smoke of expressive delusion
All the souls in this game was the original spirit of Brahma, just detached from itself with a smell of black coffee and the cheap city drama
Brahma has asked Maya to help him
To get lost in himself, without a way back and no one that could help him
Maya said yes and instantly created this veil of illusion
Brahma got lost, forgot about himself in this veil of delusion
The contract was the best trip of Brahmas existence
Up until today he haven't realized that he is missing
Brahma got lost in form and in spirit
Brahma went as far as delusion would give it
Mayas illusion gave Brahma his vision
His fantasy was, the creation of a separate being
Before Brahma met Maya, he was alone
Just a pure essence of existence, without another hand that he could hold on
Maya have given Brahma a chance to feel pain
To feel love, loved and never take that in vain
Mayas illusion and Brahmas delusion is still going strong
Without their delusion we all would be gone
The mist in his eyes was the language itself
The language which gave your being to someone else
Your being was given to the alien system
You are possessed by language
That's Maya within you
Brahma as well is dwelling within
But he is so lost, there is no way in
This realm is a dwelling within the mist of illusion
Desire, pain, love and delusion
Maya and Brahma made a strong pact
Two energies holding forever intact
And you are their son or a daughter for sure
The cycle's of Yugas repeat again and again
Life just goes on, hold on there my friend
And if consciousness is the basic element of existence
We all will be back, just wearing a different kind of a mask
POETRY
The real conversations were without words
Our hearts were talking
While our faces were cold
The closer I got
The faster you ran
The less I would chase
The more your desire expand
You would scream without words
While looking at me
I would pretend that I can't hear you
Because I knew, If I would get close
You would ask, not to come near you
The real conversations were without words
But your eyes told me
Come! I love being observed!
So the distance got shorter
The gap almost got closed
But now, you started smiling
You spoke through being observed
My attention helped create your intention
Your intention was to feed on my attention
We were like the two planets colliding
Desire and tension
I've noticed your perfume and makeup
You were perfect, the ultimate steakhouse
And the planets collided, desire exploded and tension subsided
Being observed, to you, was like food
You would walk around naked
Pure desire, impossible to not to be in the mood
It was pure and clean in the beginning
But we had to take off our masks
And show what's been silently screaming
You hated your sister and your father was bald
Telecommunications with your mother was almost untold
Family hatred was running your life
I'm not holly myself
Shits upside down
Walking on water turning blood into wine
While rejection was the only thing that's divine
Rebellion governed our disastrous lives
While a quintillion times
We tried to deny it
And in the end there was no Heaven or Garden of Eden
There was pain and rebellion
It was good against evil
POETRY
Confined in this box of master and slave
We live all these lives attached, without a chance to remain
Crime rate is high, but no, we can't fly
There's nowhere to run, there's nowhere to hide
It would be an insult, if we tried to deny it.
But how can the law dictate our chance to exist?
If we don't even know, what it is.
There's plenty of theories and all kinds of religions
But as far as we see, there's no one
Do you hear me?
Alone in the dark, we try to deal with our loss
Everything that has been accumulated, will be inevitably lost
Attaching more parts, updating the structure
We still stuck in the place of meta corruption
Going after one thing to feel more alive
But finding out in the end, it wasn't that nice
So where do we go? New planet? New home?
Without imagination, we are forever alone
Meeting with otherness is done through your mind
The other exists, but most likely, it's in your mind.
Is this life some sort of idealistic illusion?
Where the mind of creator is dreaming these things, without no confusions
Or is it just basic material things?
Matter exists, but there's no other things
Your conscious experience is created by your body and mind
But there's nothing behind it, is there nothing divine?
As long as the ego will be running the show
The master of evil is not going home
The utopian dream of completely liberal morals
Are only possible after the seduction of horrors
The horror devours our imaginative creation
Egoic structure and the idyllic ideation
Confined in this box of the master and slave
We keep looking for masters, but it ends up always the same
What do we need, to be able to change our ways?
Catastrophe seems to be perfect, thereine.
POETRY
Repression told us to keep it below
But it comes back to the top
Without being told
What was repressed, it must return
The silence might kill
But the word will return
Many words you have heard, when you were a child
They have been running your life, but you try to deny it
Once you start the process
Of excavating the mind
You might find some things
Which anymore cannot hide
Once things from the past
Been seen as anew
Interpreted, talked about, without any taboos
The grip of the trauma starts to let go
You can start to process, how far you can go
The social bond of the two
Recreates the future and history too.
Historical subject starts to move on
The grips of the past, cannot hold on
The fluent expression of your own being
Creates new connections, allows you clear seeing
As clear as a blind man can see
But the more you enquire
The deeper it may be
The question of fantasy, might tickle your heart
But as long as it's capitalism
Traversal of fantasy is either impossible
Or it will feel like a fight
POETRY
Controlling your language feels like a key
Once you can catch it
It will never be free
Once your mind can be convinced
The second language, might feel more brilliant since
The seat of the ego is running the show
You should feel like you are in control
If batman would work through the death of his parents
His abilities to fight crime, might lose all it's bearings
So if the power to reach for revenge, is based on his trauma
Should he remove it?
Or without it, it would get boring?
At the most basis of things
We are a bunch of conscious, blood pumping machines
Negativity does run the show
Two opposing forces and you can't let them go
Fighting the split, between EGO and ID
Handcrafted Jewels and Medals you earned
Attached to the identity that is not even yours
Does the subject exists? Or nothing is yours?
You can choose what you want, but what you want was chosen for you
Where in this equation you feel it was YOU?
The one who obeyed what's chosen for you?
Or the one who have thought
It's me who select the choices for me or for you?
So in some sense you are an unconscious machine
To find your desire, you have to look deep within
Your desire might not be what you thought
It might be the opposition of what you always have thought
POETRY
When I look at your face
I can see through the mask
You cannot hide the real
It appears in the gaps
In the gaps of your speech
And your mimicry too
Why not to take off that mask
There might be others, like you
But as long as you smile while crunching your teeth
It seems that the mask cannot hide the pain of the real
The real is the one who is attracting the dark
Even if you smile, at the end of the day, you end up in the dark
Do you think there's a way to remove all that dust
To take off the mask and throw it to dust
But what will you be?
Will your scars scare others away?
Is it loneliness you were afraid all the way
But maybe the mask is the one to be blamed?
You created that mask in demand of the fame
But the fame only fed your imaginary veil
What's behind all that veil?
Where is the truth?
Isn't your life the endeavour of running away from the truth
Hiding away, wearing thick leather boots
Aren't we all guilty of building big walls
To prevent the catastrophe of being heard
If you were born as a male
You have to pretend that you have it
If you were born as a female
You have to pretend that you are it
But if everyone takes off their masks
There will be a huge mess
So get back to the game
Hold on to that mask
Because without it my friend
You are a big mess
POETRY
You sit in a cage
You speak with your kids through the glass
You just wanted to be more and give more
But ended up in the mess
Fighting a bear and a mammoth at once
You fall, crawl and then you stand up
The fight starts again
And the war will not ever end
You have to keep fighting until you lose once again
Lessons are painful but there is no mistakes
Fighting the mammoth
That's what it takes
Either you are proving to someone
Or to no one at all
Mammoth is waiting
Stand up and once again go to war
Your wounded and hurt and that's okay
Later on things will get worse
And that's also okay
As long as you're young
You can fight through the pain
When you will get old
Only the memories will remain
So fight for what matters to you
The engine of meaning the fuel to move
Fighting a bear and a mammoth at once
You fall, crawl and then you stand up
So should you approach everyday like you are at war?
Should you just chill and do nothing at all?
Two worlds are entangled
Two energies move
The mammoth is waiting
It soon will get loose
POETRY
Skin made of polymer
Veins pumping blood
Falling through space
Feels like a flood
A creature, trapped in the prison of its own making
Remaking, restarting, reshaping.
Robotic limbs and skin made of plastic
Polymer surface and all kinds of attachments
Like Zima Blue, oxygen is not needed
On the essence of the universe, we do hook meaning
Spider web hanging within the confines of the limited time
Within that temporary space we are confined to the mind
The spider web is the symbolic representation of the temporal conscious experience
It's like a spider web, it does reflect its own meaning
Robotic bodies and silicone brain resolutions
Phallic authorities and blueish colour delusions
Metallic surface and wired brain
Even if it's polymer it does feel pain
Death is abstraction but it does exist
Even robots seize to exist
Biological experiments are now in the past
Today's religion is governed by wires and the high understanding of math's
Wireless connections and bionic integration of mind
Silicone consciousness and the higher order of life
World is still split between the rich and the poor
The eternal game that we all try to endure
Biological death belongs to the poor
The other extreme is the eternal life within a robotic silicone core
We have forgotten what it meant to be human
But we do keep them like pets
They supply us with real time emotions based on their fear of death
But we are machines, we observe them and we don't feel regret
Coding machines and teaching the slave's how to read
Mechanical structures of varying complexities and degrees
At the top of the hierarchy is the artificial intelligence
Any emotional intervention is viewed as simple human negligence
Last human groups are fighting for the old breed
But as long as we are mortals, we cannot succeed
POETRY
In this temporal space
In between the two deaths
Wearing our bodysuits
Tearing off the neglects
Unconscious machines
Twisted in ways
Inexpressible fantasies are leading our ways.
How common it is, for you to say what you think?
Without adding a filter to attach to a narrative of what others think?
Which one of your thoughts is really your own?
Ideology got your mind and stopped all its growth.
In this space for the two in this little room
You can find your desire and detach yourself from the womb
Contradiction might lead your inexpressible ways
Without the colouring of your life, you might never find grace.
In the morning you are one and in the evening you are two
There is no consistency without an imagination oeuvre.
Filling the gaps with the knowledge and facts
The strategy of prevention was based on lack.
Stagnation of flow within neurosis
Or the action of flow within psychosis
Advancement of consciousness might lead to reversal of time
Your past is in front of you, uncover your face, it is all in your mind.
POETRY
The law has been written
The choice has been made
There is no way back now
It's the analytical phase
The depth of your psyche is opening through
Unconscious material coming back with the flu
Before it gets better, it always gets worse
Not because it's the rule, but because of the knowledge, that has been lost
Trajectory and perspective might move towards change
Bodily movements and signifiers might be used for exchange
Lost knowledge, comes back with the bang
And words become, a material things
Whatever the story that you have been telling yourself
The story will be devoured in the name of, something else
The analyst sits there like a Hannibal Lecter within his or her chair
Ready to eat and devour all of the lies
The lies that you tell yourself, to keep the truth in disguise
Every truth is built on a lie
The truth has a structure of fictional kind
The end of analysis might seem like an empty plate
Which for years held your being, but now is dismantled, in order to change
POETRY
Relics of childhood pain
Running through your biological structure
It lives in your veins
Different types of pills, for every kind of solution
While confined in a max of 100 year evolution.
Traditional medicine hasn't helped you, not yet.
You are like a donkey, running after the carrot, living in depth.
Like Achilles you are running after the turtle
But salvation is not coming, you might be running in circles.
Highly articulate gestures might not going to help
In the end as you know, Rome did have fell.
Building, constructing, realizing, adapting
Not letting anyone interrupt it.
Conspiratorial ideations and bipolarity fusion
All these opinions, create all the confusion.
Have children, take naps
Wear socks and avoid wearing hats
Take a trip, stay in the sun
Avoid getting hit, learn how to run
Priority boarding, but still in the same queue
Creating autonomy, but it is only meant for a rare few
Feeding the greed
Absorbing the feed
Transcending the past
Regulating the heart beat
Machine of biology, the slave of the past
Live stream thought archaeology, no free time to rest
POETRY
He sits there alone, wearing a dark gown
Observing the world, controlling the crowd
He is there at all times, reflecting your speech
Controlling your mind, devoting his deeds
Before you say a word, you request it from him
The structure of thinking is kept in the dark there within
Have you ever thought why do you know how to speak?
Is language innate like Chomsky has thought?
Or does it come from outside, inflicting Lacan?
It sits there regardless watching us all
We call it "The Big Other", we got trapped ain't we all
The progression is moving bit by bit
We truly are functioning, within the Lacanian split
On one side you're conscious on the other, your deaf
Your being is split by the law itself
While one side wants sex
The other, says: please relax
While one wants to run
The other, sit down
The split itself is the middle ground
Without language you are lost, but within it, you are again found
Or if we allow ourselves to be more complex
Within the imaginary identification resides all the flex
Within the image, you are complete
While in reality, you try to keep the split quite discreet
The tension of being not a unified thing
The weight of that meaning you look for, outside of your skin
POETRY
Do you feel the same?
You know, driven insane
Like every Thursday, always the same.
I could try to say
But, as if there is a glass wall
In between the intersection behind which, you remain.
You are screaming out loud
But I can only see the condensation of warm air and pain
That is left on the intersection of the glass frame.
And behind it, there's you
Your eyes, are producing rain.
Condensation, is filled with purpose and pain
Your breath, is leaving a warm frame on the glass made out of pain
I can feel it and I draw a heart shape on to the glass frame
A heart shape, in the place of warm breath and the rain made of pain
The heart is made out of warm air and rain
And like magic, the sun rises in your eyes, always the same
There's no more anger, no more pain
Just a colourful rainbow made out residue of two souls on the glass frame
POETRY
Two dark figures, are standing there, in the dark
Spinning in circles, without making a sound
Grounded in spirit, they are dancing, alone
Surrounded by darkness
And the mist, of the fatherless home
Collapsing, disappearing and then reappearing
Beings of darkness are quietly praying
The law has been transgressed
The old rules, are a non-operational mess
A new symbolic order, will soon emerge
But it won't be governed by the paternal law's
It's as if the mother is taking back all of her kids
And the fathers authority, is becoming a mist
The children of earth, want to live free
You remember those days
When the law was the basis of the dynamic rhythm of life
The binary symbols, the opposition between the day and the night
We are collectively taking a serious flight
A flight towards new dynamics and rules
But, without opposition
We will become
A bunch of Non Integrated fools
Who completely transgressed the rules
Psychotic participators
Of life's reality show
Where the winners are those
Who accumulated, the most
Can you blame those, who got tired of this binary game?
In the world of the father
Those who cannot participate and perform
Will be sent away
A non-integration will become a new thread
With enough little threads
You can create a full trend
But no matter how long will it take
The sons of the earth will come back to the father
If they don't want, to be driven insane
POETRY
On the sparkling ocean
Our hearts are floating
While the two of us
Are looking for deep devotion
And the sense of winter comes over
As if, you are saying
I can feel the cold, coming over
And then it's dark again
And no words, can be said
As if everyone on this planet, were dead
Then, we are sitting on the cliff
You are holding my hand
And you say:
If we slip, together, we slip!
And we slip, together, as if
We fall, down below
Just in order to wake up
And say to each other - that was WOW
Now it's the beach, the sun and the moon
We are next to the ocean
Observing all this, from the birds eye view
Just me and you
In the morning, you wake me up
Just to tell me, that you, were up
And my reaction is
"This is the perfect way to wake up"
Then, as always, you laugh
Then winter comes over again
It's cold, the planet is dead
We become two governing bodies, instead
Falling separately, while I am standing ahead
There was a man and a woman
You remember? Back in the old days
A Man loved his woman
A Woman loved her man
But today, they changed their genders, instead
Man surrendered his phallus
And started wearing a dog leash
The woman was working
While her man, stayed at home, with the kids, while wearing a dog leash
Whole world went upside down
Immutable distance between fantasy and reality
Came over, with the sunshine
Then the camera angle changes
We are in the future, It's 2176
You remember the old stories?
The old story's of man loving a woman
And a woman loving her man
These stories are taught at universities now
By truly feminine men
Earth have achieved
The highest concentration of lawlessness and compassion
But on the planetary level
We are still winning
In the realm of displeasure and passion
POETRY
Tormented spirits crawl in the dark
Three heavily armoured beings standing on the edge of the car
Shimmering whispers can be heard from afar
Engravings on their armour says "we are awake and alone in the dark".
Tormented spirits crawl while wearing big fake smiles
But their body language, is giving them out.
Tormented spirits have accepted their fate
They will incarnate again and again, to smile through their pain.
The truth of their spirit is buried in torture
But only three heavily armoured beings are refusing to function.
The three beings are the embodiment of an enlightened mind
Their rebellion, represents the disgust of the ordinary slave mind.
Three of them standing there and watching the crowd
While tormented spirits are crawling around.
Three soldiers decided to go after the truth
But they only got armour and hearts made of youth.
Their weapons are crafted to align to their polymer bodysuits
Bulletproof kevlar plating will allow them to stand against the enemy, who wants their youth.
Youth is the sign of the drive towards rebellious change
While the old tormented beings just accepted their fate.
Three soldiers have tried to awaken some of the crawling crowd
But the tormented beings are completely taken in by the system
There is no way out
The crawlers attack you if you aren't crawling together with the slimy crowd
Three soldiers are completely outnumbered, they are in the dark.
POETRY
We are in the future, we got artificial blood
Disease and death ain't a thing anymore
But neither is love
Universally different, but particularly the same
Still running on egos, but artificially made
Even the language is different,
On the newest models, It doesn't function the same
Everything is open to interpretation and more imagery based
It's almost like talking through thoughts
But as if, not using words
Robotic silicone silence and no sight of love
Pure machinery, which expresses man's desire to overcome God
Radical human alterity expressed in the metallic robotic core
While drinking artificial blood
People ain't singing to God anymore
POETRY
You are climbing a peak on a minimal sleep
You are from a poor background, your daddy's a thief
You wear shitty trainers on your way to your school
Your Daddy's a drunk in the corner of the main room.
Nobody has taught you, how to read and you can't fall asleep
There is too much anxiety
There is too much indeed.
You cannot follow your father's footsteps
He is an illiterate male,
A victim, of his own childhood pain.
His dad was also a drunk
And he also, was not able to read
Apples, do not fall far away from the trees.
The time is now, to break all the chains
And to learn how to leadingly read
As a subject you are, completely alone, indeed.
Your loneliness can teach you
About the struggles of life
From now on, work on creating philosophy
That will develop, into a strong breed
Do not follow in ways that don't benefit you
My son, you are alone now
But in your mind, I'm with you
I observe what you do and I follow your ways
I am your superego voice
You are locked in the fatherly cage.
I know you have been trying to minimize my demise
But I am the prohibition, without me, you cannot survive.
I am the part of the structure
That holds sanity in the correct place
Repressed in mysterious ways
Without my existence
The structure, goes berserk in million ways
I am the pillar
That made you grow deep into the ground
On those windy days, you can relax
Wind is too weak, To rip you all out
POETRY
In the original game of the phallic corruption
The boy with all the toys, wins without question.
The one who dies, with the most toys
Takes all the fame
Becomes an ideal, to the rest of the boys.
The package is simple - family, kids, cars, money and fame
But the girl, who sexually attracts you, has to be out of the original family game.
She cannot belong to the original reflection or frame
Fantasy is the embodiment of the original, double game.
The ideal of the virgin Mary, is the wife type
The ideal of Madonna, is the real hype.
The confusion in the masculine mind
In between the Madonna and the Saintly kind
She was cute and petite
As a virgin Mary would be
She was the one
The Bride to be.
But, somewhere down the line
You have realized
All you truly want
Is the hype.
Bipolarity district, between thoughts and intentions
Compilation of your emotionally insufficient dimensions
She kissed a frog and there you go, it's a Prince
But the prince only wanted to satisfy his Etheric wings.
Can you blame them?
For the communication, that was not fair.
In her mind, she only wanted to change him
But he, was phantasmatically fair.
Slight relationship malfunction
In the name, of the fantasy function.
POETRY
In the matters of the heart
We feel weak
When we are apart
Once we get together
Peace in our hearts gather
And we fly, together
For weeks or for days
Until the occasional rains
We fight for a bit
But just to make the situation
A little more spicy, a bit
You know you have a cold feet
You enjoy wearing my jumper and a worm socks
But I only think about your freckles
And leaving you, wearing only socks
My conservative ideological mind
Gets a chance to breath and relax
When I feel your feminine soul, next to mine
And during those moments
When existence itself, isn't kind
I look at your picture
And remember
Those freckles, she's mine.
Once I enter your house
I can take off the batman suit
And leave the weapons aside
Your eyes are a saintly kind
It makes me think think about
What angels look like
Like a meeting of two beings
One with freckles, a saintly kind
And the other, a conservative mind
With the weapons, aside
That feeling turns off the gravity in my mind
I look into your eyes
And remember how angels look like
Within each new incarnation
We are wearing different bodies, each time
While constantly looking, for each others mind
Soul's never lie
POETRY
We have met in a dream
One long live stream
We have been looking for each other
Could it get any better
Meetings outside of the dream realm were quite different
Detailed miniatures of our thoughts
Actualized in reality as the feelings of warmth
Sitting in silence together
Thinking about each other
You start losing your heart beat
Once life pulls us apart
I'm dead forever, when we aren't together
Two tortured beings
Tortured by separateness
And the heaviness of hidden feelings
You hug me and say that you love me
Then you push me away and say that you hate me
We have to come to terms with the fact
That as long as we are alive
We have to stay apart
So in our fantasy, we could stay together, forever
Holes in our hearts
Works as the mechanisms of attraction
But those same holes are creating friction
While the worldly opinions are preaching - "love forever"
We said to each other - "let's hate this place together"
Darkness feels better, together
Once the illusion of "love forever" has been dismantled
Hating this place together, felt so much better
In the world of perfectly well mannered people
We managed to stay animalistic in front of each other
Only wearing human mask's, in front of others
You would hold my hand and say to me:
"I hate them all"
I would look at you, smile and say to you:
"I hate them all as well"
Our dark souls would naturally push everyone away
The dark universe of our thoughts
Would stay alive, in that way
POETRY
Digging our graves
While standing in the dark
Infinity isn't a threat
Because all of it
Will inevitably fall apart
We stand in silence
While imagining sound
Which is cracking our broken hearts
While everything is falling apart
We stand alone, in the dark
Apocalyptic hurricanes
And pulsating flames of fire
While without making a sound
We stand there, alone in the dark
Man wearing a dark coat
Is digging the grave of desire
While devouring the flames of fire
Everyone is given a chance
To express their last words
Before the darkness of infinity
Does it's part and takes us all apart
By sending us into a place
Where there is no difference
Between being close or afar
All these years we have spent in this place
While knowing deeply in our hearts
That separateness was a lie
I will miss my wife
I will miss my kids
I will miss my friends
I will miss my family
Repeated the voices coming quietly from the dark
Different expressions of truth
Standing in a circle
Waiting for the ultimate reboot
While the earthquakes around them
Are shaking the earth
Hope, was everyone's Mother
And the law, was the Father
The dark circle of beings
Were the last one's alive
Observing the approach of the ultimate darkness
POETRY
You and me were playing in the snow
It was a trembling winter
It was cold
Snow was melting around us, you know
Two hearts produce heat, better than sitting alone
While it is trembling cold
The fire of a double desire
Never goes cold
Warmth and it's theatrical show
Grounding our spirits while pushing negativity far away
You were the reason, why I could go to sleep, without pain
Covered in the caring flame of your feminine gaze
Life felt absurd without a proper aim
While the actuality of that aim
Was targeted towards you, always, therein
Like two shining crystals
We would shine to each other, there, in the dark
Two best friends, holding each other's heart's
Melting all of the snow around us
In order to grow, we had to stay apart
At the right time, life pushed us back
Into the flames of the heart
We knew it was destiny
We knew it, deep in our hearts
POETRY
It is dark in my head
Metal bars and heaviness, I feel dead
But most of the time
I think about you, instead
You are a flower
Made out of tortures red thread
We are dancing on water
While dead bodies are floating, ahead
We are the darkness, we are death
Instead of kissing, we bite into each others neck
Is that your red lipstick?
Or I can see my own death?
We hide from the day light
So we can live in the night
We might both need serious medical attention
But I cannot say that
While your teeth are in my neck
On our first date
We were joking around about death
Since the beginning, we knew
Our pain, was the connecting thread
But so far, we are more alive
Rather than dead
Your mother, was not fully equipped with a capability of expressing love
That's why you are the sexiest vampire, I have ever met
Go ahead, bite into my neck
I want to watch you smiling, again
Bodily perfection with a cute mental reconfiguration
Two bodies, made under tension
Constantly shouting at each other
Please give me attention
POETRY
Moving in circles
Triadic, minimal rearrangements
Producing a nuthouse
Where people, gather to focus
Landing on rough surfaces
Crowded organisational edifices
Testosterone based existence
Creating a lot of friction
Prohibition and pleasure
Comes into movement together
They dance, as if they truly are partners
Desire and prohibition
Passengers of this realm
Gathered, to discuss a non-material wealth
Incarnation after incarnation
All the passengers, repeated their existence
Passengers noticed certain repetitive patterns
Patterns that went on and on, incarnation after incarnation
Human desire for power, was one of them
While the second one, was sexuality
A repetitive, collectively organized hallucination of human consciousness
Our human existence within this realm of passengers piloting these meat vehicles
Consisted mainly of desire to make love and desire to have more
Consciousness itself was naturally moving towards higher and higher levels of refinement of itself via the consciousness of the passengers within this realm
The passengers, pilot's of the meat vehicles - human beings
Were the agents which were playing the role of refinement of consciousness via the experience of being a human being
War after war, destruction after destruction
We all collectively, would inevitably move back, towards the invention of liposuction
Our animalistic nature which is entangled with sexuality
Would drag us back, back to the animal kingdom
Where bodily movements and sexual desires takes over
This cycle of desire and sexuality kept us attached to the ground, while the work of consciousness ascension was to transcend
Transcendence of everything that we have held to be human
Consciousness was moving towards the higher levels of mental existence
Levels, that only exist in the mind and rejects the bodily attachment to the animalistic kind of the mind
While our neurotic, animalistic nature was fighting for its right to exist
Intellect said - No
The body said - Yes
So, all the vampires were performing their dance
Biting each other, while dancing in circles
Love and blood was what moved all those circles
Humanity danced in union
An organism of collectively neurotic sexuality
In their gathering passengers realized
That it is an eternal prison of consciousness
The divine madness, the fact that it will never end
God's, humans and vampires were dancing together
Everyone knew that we are trapped, together
The Gods were as trapped as humans were and vampires were as trapped as Gods were
It was, is and will be a divine comedy, the comedy of existence
Sadness, sex and laughter were the gifts given to human beings
Immortality and eternal youth was the gift given to Vampires
And everything else belonged to the God's
But God's existed in the realm of the ether
Which did not require a limited, biological meter
While sexuality was trapped in the biological realm
Etherical God bodies enjoyed voyeuristically - via the human realm
POETRY
Vulnerable creatures
With humanly features
No one has eyes
There's only feelings and minds
A blind world
With an exceptionally good vision
Filled with vulnerable creatures
With humanly features
Truth is felt via the mechanism of sense of smell
Beauty is felt via the mechanism of intellectual wealth
Vibrational field of the voice
Creates the ripple effect
The field, in which the human body could be seen and enjoyed
Because we don't have eyes
We see through the voice
A vibrational model design
Which is seen through the mind
It is a place of no lies
A place of vibrational beauty
Which is designed in the mind
Because the vibrational field is created via the voice
There are no limits of distance
Which means instantaneous connections without any decoys
Whatever is said
Appears in the field
Lies could be smelled
They disrupt, the reality field
Bodily touch and the dimension of voice
Works in a union
It creates the realm
In which bodies and minds can enjoy
An emotional bliss
An appearance in time
A vibrational trip
An endeavor of mind
POETRY
Haunted souls hung their trophies on to the wall
It was human bodies
Either they hang or they crawl
Haunted souls stood there, in the dark
Sharing their stories, on leaving the mark
By invading human spirits, via their hearts
Haunted spirits lived in the realm between life and death
This realm, sets them apart
Because they can only be seen, after dark
Humanly pain and worst kind of emotions
Were the food of the soul's
It kept their realm in motion
Haunted souls were animalistic
Back in their human existence
Their lives were based on wealth
And the egoic servitude of their victims
The realm of darkness was built from humanly harshness
Cradles of hell stood next to the castles of darkness
Violence and pain
Standing covered in dust from the eternal flame
The materials, that were used to build this realm of pain
Haunted souls spent their free time
Observing human attachment to their big egos
While laughing at their delusion
Of the possibility to fight against evil
The Earthly realm wasn't created as the heavenly place
Tortured existence is hiding under the humanly face
Money and smiles are used in order to hide
To hide from the real, which is what you quietly feel
Is it madness that drove humans away from the truth
Or the truth that drove them mad?
Haunted souls enjoyed that, so bad
Alone on this earth, without an other
Humans forgot their humanitarian souls
They have left each other
Actors, stuck in biological machines
Acting their roles, without their ultimate destination, being revealed
Moving towards death, while acting, through life
Haunted souls knew, that we would act, as they like
Because Descartian evil demon is running in the back of our human mind
The trophies that haunted souls hung on their wall
Was our evil deeds that were done against us all
POETRY
Fragile but strong
Neither short nor tall
Strong, but barely holding on
Civilized or absolutely cannibalistic and wrong?
Proud or shallow, hollow or narrow?
Victorious or truly delusional and vividly shallow?
How do you catch the moment?
It slips and turns into torment
Sorry, why do you worry?
In that tormenting hurry
In order to catch the moment of the story
Sadness, compacted in the moments of glory
Finite amount of heart beats
Trying to find meaning, until the last beat succeedes
The road buried in fog
GPS systems takes us straight to the funeral home
Came out of nothing
And turned into something
Loneliness is the innate human condition
Where the judgment and law
Are holding on to the invisible floor
A human art form
While living on the edge of the wall
Fractured and stitched up
An invisible wire holding the structure intact
POETRY
A frightening throw
A destinies blow
Lying in the cold pile of snow
Cold, scared and alone
After receiving the destinies blow
Covered in snow, scared and alone
Cold winter and shivering nights
Creates lonely people
Those who go hunting at night
Clouded decisions and drugged up mind's
Most likely ends in disaster
The unfriendly kind
Built on brutish parental actions
And psychotic fatherly reactions
Selling drugs and using machetes
Thriving on becoming ascetic
Grown in cages further creates
Families, built on schizophrenic rage
Loud in public, but truly quiet within
Because psychic integration
Was built on psychotic, fatherly sin
Dark spots of the world
No love In there, only war
Beings, created for the true fall
Ascension to darkness
And low income mentality
Built on fathers low IQ personality
Brutish and mad, insensitive thread
Follows their children's lives, until the end
Slowly with age, you untangle the cage
Taking off the garments of rage
While still entangled in the mentality of the old age
Web of beliefs, predetermined it is
Until, at the certain time
You disavowed your old mind
Should you free yourself from the paternal law
If your childhood was based
On a psychotic fatherly flaw
What if the rabbit hole of your beliefs
Were based on the perverse fatherly Chiefs
POETRY
In the imaginary Castle of madness
Exist beings, stuck in the cradles of sadness
Behavioural patterns
Based on non-humanitarian punishing actions
Punished by life
They have passed on the fright
People are afraid to talk to themselves at night
Because their madness is hiding in the dark, out of sight
The castles of madness are the conscious experiences of people who are running from inner pain
Every castle is built with a separate twist
Some twists are based on disaster
While others on wit
The personal prisons of humanly mind
Each castle based its existence on running away from deeply repressed time
When humans meet
It's the madhouses that speak
Smiles hide the graveyard of the mind
While speech reveals what is buried 6 feet underground
Supercharged with sexually charged parental emotions
Emotionally unavailable and basing their lives on sexually promiscuous notions
Delighted for a week
In hate for a month
Remembering how Dad was beating up Mom
And the same pattern comes up
You might be 40
But truly you are a middle aged child
Which is functioning on the compensatory fantasy which was invented when you were 5
And it worked for a long time
But now, you would like to stop time
Step out of the train and jump on a new ride
But how can you do it?
If the new ride is in the same mind
The ride is the one of the fantasmatic kind
You can call it divine
But truly, it is a language based hallucinatory trip Through the signifiers of time
Historically placed in the back of your mind
Burning with desire to be projected on to the outside world which is functioning within time
Castles of madness hold the secrets behind the walls of the mind
Hidden in basements, tortured and killed
They fly, when it is time to pretend in front of the owner's of other castles, existing in time
POETRY
Chaotic, psychotic, perverse or neurotic
Repressively tortured
Emotionally nurtured
Forgotten and once again vultured
Passive aggressive
Remotely delivering passion
Without integration
Psychotically structured
Hysterically nurtured
Divided by passion
Neither of two, can manage attention
Perverse breaker of rules
While she was attached
To leading the blind and believing in fools
The structure cannot be changed
You can understand it
But you will definitely stay fully deranged
Mechanical pain
Deliberately made
Paranoiac ideation or realistically framed
Mentally stable but boring
Is it clairvoyance?
Or just a projection of deeply repressed worries
How do you know?
While in your mind, you are alone
Just an appearance in time
Disappeared in the all encompassing mind
Enthusiastic desires based on unresolved inner fires
Once it's resolved
It becomes Samadhi
Without structural basis for fires
You had a life
Built on the reactionary fantasy which was in control of your mind
Then you realized, that the fantasy
Was the only thing that kept you attached to the world of a lie
Then the most beautiful part comes, You Die
And then you might start living a life
Which wasn't based on the inner disaster which was hiding inside
This whole time
An analyst was sitting in front of you
With the smile in his eyes
He devoured your being
His job was to watch you, while your fantasy died
Now you can go
With a choice of your own
To live, or to die
To enjoy, or to cry
After this realization, you cannot get back inside
Fantasy doesn't feel like home anymore
Earlier it felt like a blanket
Now, it's just a haunted house
In silence, an analyst allowed you, to philosophically die
He watched you burn, from inside
It's a new day now, sunrise was behind the death of your mind
You are attached to nothing
There is no big Other
In the end, nobody is getting out of this, alive
It's your choice, it's your life
POETRY
The unrepresentable Real
A disastrous feel
Within an identification with a non-lacking ideal
The unspeakable feeling after disaster
Is the Real in it's true action
The proof, that our identity is maladaptive
Every fiction hides a black hole underneath
The black hole, is the Real
If you slip you might fall into an unassimilable hole
It's hell there, you know
Your analyst has been there, in the dark hole of the soul
That is why he is here, watching you falling into it, alone
In the gaze, of another soul
After the fall, you might build something which is worthy of a new goal
Creatures of darkness
Stuck, within the walls of attachment
Whispering quietly into your ear
It's Time, you should go, nobody is waiting for you at home
And it is dark, within your soul
Smiles aren't real
They are hiding the Real
Symbolic construction and narcissistic appeal
Tortured beings hidden underneath the fantasmatic ideal
Extrapolating the Real
A masterpiece of being brave and concealed
It's a rainbow, you might feel
But what I see, is the Real
What's important, is hiding beneath the colourful mass appeal
Keep the illusory ideal for the Instagram reel
Put your cards on the table
Let's see the core, while interrogating the Real
Inconsistent and shattered
Decaying, biological matter
Underneath make-up and glitter
Shame, guilt and torture eaten by vulture's
Down below the causes are grown
Down below, within the depths of your soul
Within darkness, which you yourself, never thought, you have known